When Ageing Meets Perimenopause

I came across a recent study that says ageing occurs in two bursts - at 44 and 60. The body goes through significant changes at these points. Changes that make you question the good genes you've been riding on. Now if this research had shown up on my timeline 10 years ago, I would have swiped left and not spent another two seconds on it. But my physical and mental conditions at precisely 44 had me sharing that study on all my platforms because it was so real for me. 

Add Perimenopause to Ageing

One word: MAYHEM. 

Weight gain. Changing skin. Sugar cravings. Moods swings. Brain fog. Low energy. Hourly hot flushes. Multiple night sweats. Trouble sleeping. Irregular periods. Depression that took me to the darkest of places. It was everything all at once it felt like I was living inside someone else's body. I could not cope being alive. Turning to doctors weren't helpful. Most said it was "normal", with one MCP of a medical professional saying "you're not special". That one had it coming and that's a story for another day. Long story short, I was put on HRT that year - and like all HRTs, you need to shop around for a combination that works for you. I discovered that with a low dosage of DHEA, I felt like myself again - which was a big win! Those dark thoughts soon faded, and I could finally cope with the other symptoms like a "normal, middle-aged, perimenopausal woman". This cycle could repeat itself at a lower or higher intensity in the future but the point is this: the difference between light and darkness was one doctor who heard me. Which was really the thing that broke the cage I was in. 

Life Shouldn't be a Misery During Perimenopause

I wish there was a magic pill for navigating the miseries of perimenopause (and ageing at the same time). There isn't one way for all. But I guess for me it began with that doctor who did not try to dumb me down. It gave me the hope and validation I needed to move forward. Mine began at 40 with irregular period but women could start experiencing various symptoms as early as 35. These days I just walk away from people who tell me I'm too young for this just because of differing experiences. Or I make a teaching moment out of it. Getting into online communities and finding my circle of women who are in the same phase has been a breath of fresh air. Sharing respectfully, comparing and finding support opened up my eyes to fresh ways at looking at the changes. So these days, I'm unashamedly vocal about my experiences and symptoms. And educating myself on this part of women's health has been ever so life-changing!

Here are a few books that have helped my friends and I understand that navigating life during (peri)menopause can be fulfilling and beautiful :)

• The M Word by Dr Ginny Mansberg 
• The Menopause Brain by Lisa Mosconi PhD
• The Second Spring by Kate Codrington 
• The New Meno Pause by Dr Mary Claire Haver 

I'm still learning about this phase of life. Some months I feel great and then there are phases where everything is intense and chaotic. Listening and supporting my body with the right nutrients, adjusting my movement routines and most of all, making peace with this phase that's going to be here for a bit - and being consistent in the things I do (more on future posts!) for myself, I guess is how I'm managing through this new era. 

I turn 46 in 3 months. This journey is not linear for sure, but I think I'll be okay. 

Happy Women's Day :) 

A dress from the clearance section for a recent
family wedding cuz nothing fit from my old wardbrobe. 
Wearing clothes that actually fit rather than trying to fit into
ill-fitting old clothes really is freeing.