In a couple of days, I complete and begin another year of my life, officially gravitating towards the late 30s. I don't know what to feel about it. Mostly, I'm not too happy about how time is just eating up my life. In no time, I'll be 40 and then comes the 50s. Not sure what's beyond that if I'm still around! Maybe it's the nightmare I had last night where a swamp of wasp or wasp-like insects washed over me. They didn't sting but they were kind of evil, like they had meant to harm me and they actually did. Soon, I was panicking. My legs swelled up, my face bloated with visible blisters. Mom was rushing my brother to send me to the hospital but he just stood there in his usual lackadaisical way, maybe even taking comfort with what he saw as I became frantic. And then, I woke up.
I have vivid dreams every night and I remember them in detail. During deep sleep, I know that I'm in a dream and some days, the dreams are a continuation of something I've had before. The husband is always fascinated with my stories in the mornings. I used to be quite bothered by my dreams when I was younger but I've learnt to enjoy them over time. These days, I look forward to going to bed so I could go on adventures. They make me feel like I'm living in a movie set or a different realm. Some settings are the same like the houses I grew up in, others are so fictional with mythical creatures like the large, black dragon which was also a train? Lol. Its body, a long stretch of coaches. They occur in colour because I actually dreamt in full B&W once and was totally fascinated by it. The difference is profound. Some dreams are the recurring type and they usually have the same theme like I'm sitting for an examination or gliding in the air or I'm naked with other naked people. A small number of dreams affect me very much even in a sleep state. I wake up in tears or trying to punch or kick at something.
The wasp dream is still bothering me though. Not sure if most people have vivid dreams like I do.
|A favourite pic of my niece Scarlet and I taken at|
Chinatown in Melbourne in January.